A Fine and Peculiar Place

Good morning, gentle readers. Yesterday l started to enter a post, screwed it up, and lost it. Just as well; in retrospect, it sucked. Today, however, is a brand new day, and not just any day either--it's LEAP DAY! Feeblewary 29th, which shows up only once every four years. Given our tendency to use most holidays as an excuse to buy and sell products, isn't it amazing that we haven't yet figured out a way to turn this day into some kind of monster blowout? Maybe the rarity of this day is the reason why; there isn't enough money to be made from it. Oh well, at least one special day is safe from commercial exploitation...for now.

l led off yesterday's failed post with the admission that l'm already hooked on this blogging stuff. Not even a week into this little adventure, and l'm a confirmed blog junkie. Can't wait to get in here to piss and moan; everything that crosses my brain cell is grist for the mill. This is obviously why blogging is a big deal--it's addictive! Which can only mean that sooner or later concerned parents, religious leaders, and politicians will begin touting blogging as the "new crack." Laws will be enacted to stop the horrible phenomenon of people saying what they actually think, in their own personal forums; there will be a whole new government enforcement agency--BEA, the Blog Enforcement Agency--to track down and bring to justice those who flout the laws which are intended to "protect them from themselves;" there will be commercials ( SHUT UP...your anti-blog) promoting the virtues of keeping quiet; and of course, Law And Order will promptly feature an episode in which Sam Waterston and whichever hottie happens to be his "assistant" (he always seems to get yet another hottie for a "partner" every time the previous one leaves the show) haul into court and prosecute the leader of an "underground blog ring." This is just scratching the surface. l expect that one day soon l'll be standing before a room of strangers saying, "Hello, my name is Troy...and l'm a blogger."

They'll have to catch me first, the bastards...

One of the things that may make some gentle readers flee A Find and Peculiar Place will be my habit of referring to earlier posts. l'm going to be doing it, because l don't want to just say it and leave it behind; l'm not a writer by any stretch of the imagination, so l don't (or at least not yet) have the ability to say everything l want to say the first time around, and l prefer to be as clear about my meaning as possible. lt is with this intention that l offer some more thoughts re Mel Gibson's The Passion of the Christ. Looking back over my earlier, rather flippant post of 2-26/04, it seems that a couple of things could be cleared up. ln it, i said in part,"...it is not the subject matter, it is the way the film has been gaining its pre-release buzz." That is to say, we have all heard so much about the film in advance, now that it's out we feel compelled to see it. For openers, because even here in A Find and Peculiar Place seeing big-screen flicks costs money, l don't see anything unless l've got an advance screening pass, which l don't get many of; for seconds, l find the very kind of advance buzz (the "anti-Semitic" charges seem to have been lame from the start, and served only to promote the film)Passion has gotten to be off-putting, if only because l would prefer to see a film that l don't feel required to see. l also said that when Temptation was released, we got a collective hellfire-and-brimstone response from the Christian world, long before any of them ever saw a frame of it. But for Passion, we are seeing whole congregations flocking to theatres, and passing out free tickets: blind embrace, before most of them have seen anything more than what's been allowed on TV. Where l come from, we call this a "double standard." Sorry, but in my humble opinion you may not condemn one while you praise the other. Yes, l know that Passion was based on Scripture (that is my understanding at least, and l'm sure Mr.Gibson and Co. did their best to stick closely to Gospel; l won't denigrate his skills as a filmmaker), while Temptationwas merely based on a novel by Nikos Kazantzakis (hope l spelled that right). l'm not comparing the films in that sense. The name of the central character--who is also the subject matter, with different portrayals--is the same in both films, that's all; and one is getting the gold mine while the other got the shaft, so to speak. Double. Standard. Last of all, if Mr. Gibson simply had to make Passion, leaving alone the question of whether or not the $25-30 mil of his own dough he spent making it might not have been put to use in a better way if the man really wanted to make a difference, it sems to me he might have gone about the business of doing so in such a way that it might not have drawn the kind of attention it has, and released it with as little fanfare as possible, perhaps even going straight to DVD, rather than going worldwide on the big screen. lf asked, all he might have said would have gone something like, "l made The Passion of the Christbecause l wanted to make a personal statement about what l beleve. Now l offer it to the rest of the world; let people decide for themselves."
Humility, when it's honest humility, instead of the kind of "humility" we saw during Mr.Gibson's ABC interview (read: commercial for Passion), speaks for itself. 'Nuff said.

Good morning, gentle readers. Most of you (most of you, that is, who don't actually exist as of yet, l hasten to remind myself) will have noticed that two of the last three posts are essentially the same thing. The explanation is obvious; l screwed up. l entered one of them , was satisified with it, and posted it, but when l tried to view it, it didn't show up! Thinking l had managed to delete it (and without even trying!), l re-posted. l then went on to say a few words about that movie Danny Glover's partner made (notice how l avoid using the name Mel Gibson? there must be something there, but that's for later posts) after which l went to sleep expecting to wake up facing the Inquisition. They haven't shown up yet, so they must be backlogged. 'Nuff said.

lt seems to me that before l go much further that l should offer some explanation as to why l have begun this blog. Part of it, of course, is my mother's eventual death, which is still on hold, and if it happens to stay that way indefinitely, l am not about to complain. Part of it is that blogging has become an "in" thing to do, and for once l feel like doing something everybody else is doing. Part of it is inspiration from my friend Jay (yes, l do have other friends, and no, l'm not going plug his blog again right now).

But the main reason is this: l have started A Fine and Peculiar Place to challenge myself. Do l, who have up till now not really led a life so much as l have led an existence, really have anything to say?

l am not the most outgoing person walking the earth. ln crowds of more than two people l become the silent one who stands back and lets the others do all the talking, inevitably getting farther and farther behind in the conversation, and usually trying to get a word in edgewise on subjects that have already been disposed of by the rest of the group. Here, though, l am doing the talking, and whether or not anyone ever listens, at least it's out there, for whoever cares to a take a look.

And best of all, it's keeping me from beelining straight to www.onlymovies.com and looking at free porn clips. lf THAT is not some kind of personal progress, l don't know what is.

Good news, gentle readers! My mom's operation, which I thought was scheduled for Friday--tomorrow--was this morning, and IT WAS A SUCCESS! We get to keep her around for a little while longer! I won't say I cried when I got the news ( I was forced to be at work today for economic reasons)(I work for a real bosshole, and l will deal with THAT particularly ugly subject in future posts), but I will admit to leaking around the eyes in a superdoublextrahappy fashion. We--my sisters, Phyllis and Sharon, and I--went to see her this evening. I was first into her room, and my first thought--which l vocalized--was, "She's out of it," and that was certainly how she looked. It was saddening to see her that way, hooked up to machines and with tubes in her nose and throat, as defenseless as a newborn kitten. We gathered round her bed quietly, for a moment, then we began to leave, to let her rest. As I was on my way out I heard a sound, and looked around to see her with her eyes open. Phyl must have heard her too, because she came back in with Sharon. So we all got to visit with her a little tonight anyway.

Not yet, gentle readers. Not yet. And how was your day today?

l just reviewed my last post, and was reminded of something: the underlying theme of this blog is "Random thoughts and occasional half-baked opinions." So far, l've been failing to post either. l find myself guilty as charged, gentle readers; l promise to spend a night in the iron maiden, just as soon as l can get myself down from this cross...

Speaking of crosses, l must make a confession: l do not live under a rock. Therefore l have been made aware (as everybody else in Western Civilization has by this time) of Mad Max's--sorry, Lethal Weapon's--oops, sorry again, Braveheart's--biopic, The Passion of the Christ, complete with what is apparently the most cinematically accurate crucifixion ever filmed. lt has had mostly mixed reviews, at least from secular film critics, but most of them don't seem to think it a bad movie, or at least not all bad. l am about to say the first thing guaranteed to get me in trouble with some True Believer(s) out there. l have no interest in seeing this movie. You should understand that it is not the subject matter, it is the way the film itself has been gaining its pre-release buzz. And it sure doesn't help that Pat Robertson is enthralled with it. More important, though, is the fact that the last time (the last time l can think of, anyway) we had a film dealing with the life and death of Jesus, said film being The Last Temptation of Christ, we had the exact opposite of what we're seeing from the non-secular world in response to this one: complete comdemnation, sight unseen. And that film l did see, sort of. l went to it with my friend Jay Manifold (whose blog, A Voyage to Arcturus, l referred you to in my first post, and why haven't you been there yet? it's guaranteed to raise your IQ, unless you're me; the bandwidth of the intelligence is too high for my brain cell to assimilate), and so l have a witness to the fact that l spent most of it sawing logs, loud enough for the rest of the audience to hear very well. l'm not saying l'd fall asleep during The Passion, but hey, after Monty Python's Life of Brian, what more do we need to know?

And there you have it, gentle readers. My first random thoughts.

Always look on the bright side of life...

Good news, gentle readers! My mom's surgery, which l had thought was scheduled for tomorrow(Friday, as l type this), was done this morning, and IT WAS SUCCESSFUL! We get to keep her around for a little while longer! l won't say l cried when l learned the results, but l will admit to leaking around the eyes in a superdoublextrahappy fashion. We--my sisters, Phyllis and Sharon, and l--went to the hospital to see her this evening. l was the first to go into her room when we got there; my first thought--which l vocalized--was "She's out of it," and that was certainly how she looked. lt saddened me to see her lying there in her bed, hooked up to machines, as defenseless as a newborn kitten. We gathered around her for a moment, then as we started to leave, to let her rest, l heard her say something, and turned to see her opening her eyes. l turned to tell my sisters that she was awake, but Phyl must have heard her too, because she came back in with Sharon. So we all got to visit with her a little anyway.

None of this means she is out of the woods, by any means. lt just means we have staved off the Reaper for a little while longer. But maybe we can make the time we have left count.

Maybe.

Good morning, gentle readers. The first thing I'll do for my second entry is introduce myself. My name is Troy, I'm 42 years old, and I live in Peculiar,MO. For the time being (side track: everytime I find myself using that phrase, I keep seeing it in my head as, "For the Time Being," as if I were making obeisance to a temporal deity from some long-lost ancient culture), that's enough to start, since my "gentle readers" do not as yet exist, so far as I know. The name of my blog, of course, is a takeoff from a famous line in a poem, but don't ask me who wrote it, I don't know and it's too early in the morning to look it up. The line is as follows...

"The grave's a fine and private place..."

I assure you that I am not writing from the grave, as far as you know. It's also a screen name I use in regional chat in Yahoo, but I have given up chat, for a number of reasons, the first of which is this:

As I said in my first post, there is a major issue of grief which will be reported on in future posts. In a nutshell, my mother is dying.

She spent much of the first half of '02 in pain, but would not go to a doctor for fear of what she would learn about her condition. In August of that year, she became unable to urinate, and was finally forced to go. The diagnosis was the worst possible: stage IV ovarian cancer. It had grown to the point that it was blocking her kidneys. After several chemotherapy treatments, she underwent a full hysterectomy in December '02, which was successful, followed by several more chemo treatments, which eventually had to be discontinued when the chemicals used began making her nearly as sick as the cancer had. She was tested monthly througout the summer of last year, and these tests were negative; but in December '03 it returned with a vengeance, metastasizing in her liver. At this time it has expanded enough to almost completely block the opening to her stomach, so that she cannot eat or drink. She has spent much of the last three weeks vomiting bile, and it was not until this past Sunday, when the hospital staff ran a tube into her stomach in order to pump the bile out, that she was able to sleep for a full night. As of this writing she is in the hospital, scheduled for surgery to be performed this coming Friday. This is very risky: in her weakened state, it could be fatal for her. They have apparently decided to try, in an effort to let her eat again.

But regardless of the outcome, she will only have a few weeks or months of life left.

I'll post the results when we know what they are.

Welcome to my blog! I hope that anyone who chances across it will not fall asleep by the time I finish this sentence. So what do I mean by "Random thoughts and occasional quasi-opinions?" Well, I'm going to define "random thoughts" as ideas which surface in my brain cell that I enter here for later consideration; and "occasional quasi-opinions" as ideas that I already have (but won't go into here) which have solidfied further than my random thoughts, yet still make sense, at least from my less-than-informed point of view. (Just so you know, since we're meeting for the first time: if I sound like I know what I'm talking about, you should not assume that I really do. If you want to read somebody who knows what he's talking about, I refer you to my friend Jay Manifold's blog, A Voyage to Arcturus. HE'S the brains, sweetheart!)
I'll also talk about stuff I like: movies, tv shows, music, sports (I am seriously stoked about the Royals this year), and once in a while i may take a wild stab at creative writing of sorts. Since this is my very first post, I will sign off here, but with a serious caveat: there is major grief to be reported on in future posts, perhaps very near future posts.

Let's see where this takes us, you and I , shall we?